Looking back and inside

I have not put down too much about my life recently. I think it is because of two reasons.

One of the reasons is that I did not really have time for blogging. Summer Uni keeps me incredibly busy which means that I work 10 hours minimum daily (sometimes even more) plus working on the weekends too, both days. Since about the end of May I have been working every weekend as well, except for maybe one weekend when we held the annual birthday festival of His Holiness the 14. Dalai Lama.
This crazy period is expected to last for about three more weeks and after then I can relax a bit. I will have about 3-4 days to regain my strength and "recharge my batteries" before I leave for Japan in August. 4 more weeks to go. Huh, time is flying by really fast.

The other reason for not writing anything constructive is that I did not feel like. I feel that now I am at the stage of turning and watching into the "inside", kind of digesting things. Definitely a lot of things have happened around me lately but there are so many things that happened, I have so many thoughts about these, and my thoughts are evolving so quickly, that I simply think that it is unnecessary to keep expressing myself. Whenever I arrive to a "milestone" tho, I stop, look back and evaluate the journey that is behind me (and report what is to be reported :) ).

If you want to have a "report" for now, see how gracious I am, here you go :)

- No training for two weeks. The guys are in summer camp and after then I.R. is on holiday. D. needed help with preparing for his test so the two of us met a few times outside of the regular trainings as well and I helped him correcting his mistakes and checking if he new all the required stuff. He is the one with the movement coordination problem. Now I got an sms from him that he passed the 10 and 9 kyu tests. He sounded very happy - I am glad that I could help at least and the belt around my waist actually had some use.

- Finally 3 of us will go to Japan. I suspected that the number will significantly drop. I witnessed so many determined promises, like "Yes, I will definitely go, of course". And when it came to actually bringing the sacrifice for the aim, there were sudden immovable objects in the way. I understand it of course, as I have been there, too. But I realized that these huge objects will always show up. It is only your decision whether you can overcome them or not. Everything is only as important for one as much s/he wants.

- I've read a great book, The Path of the Bodhisattva, written by Shantideva. It is a brilliant book. It really makes you think about things, pulls you back to the ground and makes you go as soft as the butter. It gave me so much inspiration for practicing the Dharma, that when I finish work in the evening I can hardly wait to get home and sit down to practice, and when I go to sleep I can hardly wait for the dawn when I can wake up and continue with meditation again.
In the evening I do Shine (the practice of let' say, letting thoughts go) and recite Sangcho Monlam, which is an inspiration-prayer for developing the proper behavior, especially for those who took the Oath. It is all together about 30-40 minutes.
In the morning I wake up at 4.45 , after the "bathroom-project" I start at 5.00 with a "Tara meditation" which lasts for an hour and then I still have 10 minutes to dress up and leave for work (breakfast is in the office). So it is not a supportive schedule for workers but everything has a price. I wanna get out of this endless miserable wheel and also there is so much need to make yourself useful for others, so this little inconvenience is really worth it, it is beyond any question.

- Finally, Csabi is in Mongolia and he will return on Thursday. He sent a cool pic that I try to insert here. It looks like he really feels at home there :-) My savage horseman :-P